Clay Feet

To see a friend fall victim to the lure of alcohol again in again is as depressing as it gets. For a person you respect, for his ideals , logic and the way his lives his life… when he is sober, kills a little part of you as well. And then he turns around and asks you why you are helping him in the first place. Because its your need to be needed by him. I could argue till I am blue in the face but it would make no difference to him . Because it’s not him any more. It a weak being impersonating a friend who has make me find me. A creative genius in the world of advertising is being eaten away by his desperate need for alcohol. They say to be an advertising creative poster boy you have to let the child in you lose. But my friend has always been a child in his mind, I refuse to believe so, but that is what he claims is the truth. The clarity of his vision and his logic make me believe him. Then every time he is romancing death with alcohol why am I so concerned? Would it matter to me if he died as a result of over poisoning his body and mind? Would it matter to me if he killed himself in this suicidal daze? The answer is yes but a very selfish yes. He adds tremendously to my sense of life. He makes me feel 10 feet tall because I know him, and because I love him. He’s been there when Aditya went astray, he’s been there when I couldn’t find my way , he has been there when I quit my job. An unquestioned hug and unrelenting sermon on self-realisation. But more that his presence makes me believe that there is more to life and I have more to discover in this life.
There is nothing in the outside world that is going wrong for him, he earns a cool BD3000 tax free, he has a house, and has found someone special to get married to .. so on the outside there is nothing wrong … but I wonder what’s going on in his mind. I have called someone from AA who would in a better position than me to understand this and help him. I hope in some way I could be of more help but this time around I can’t I just can’t. I have done all I can except one last thing. I pray to the lord above to help my friend find his feet again. Because my idol placed on that pedestal can’t have feet of clay.